3 wishes!

I was calmly walking down the street! One of those days when you just roam nowhere and just enjoy the rain that rarely falls. In a traffic light post was a poster. Plain white with the typical times new roman lettering. The message was clear:
"The world is going to end tomorrow and you have 3 wishes. Are you ready?"
Well, this is a new one. No "call this number right now!" nor "we have the solutions to your problems!".
I decided to keep my roam in the rain and keep my head occupied with this thoughts. There's no point in asking for world peace and the end of hunger because the world is going to end anyway. No need to ask for money and fortune because there's not enough time to enjoy it. And at this point it was starting to get hard... I started to feel my chest shrinking and crushing my inner organs, my heart racing like a maniac... PANIC!
I thought about you, about all the plans and dreams and amazing things waiting for us to live...
Slowly the rain got warmer and warmer, and heavier... and if trying to wash panic away...
I looked ahead and a bright ray o sunlight was ripping the dense roof of clouds. Word by word my wishes started to gain shape:"I wish I can spend every second of the rest of my life by your side!" and I repeated it 3 times... that was my wish, three times my wish...
I realized that if the world ends tomorrow there's only one thing I must do. I picked up my phone:"Did I tell you today you are beautiful? Did I tell you today that I love you so much that there're no words that can possibly describe it? I will cook dinner tonight. Dress fancy!"
The rain was now gone as well as all my fears and panic.
We had dinner and several bottles of wine. We laughed so truly and so perfectly. And now here you are sleeping like an angel...

The alarm clock went off. You are mumbling something... Guess the world didn't end... Was it just a dream or did we actually laughed all that last night?...
I kiss you in the forehead. And just in case the world ends tomorrow I whisper: You truly are beautiful!

Incredible

It was a sunday like every other sunday before, like many sundays to come. Nothing special about it (or was it?). All in a sudden inspiration struck. I could feel the ideas floating but the mess in my head was as bad as the mess in this desk. I needed a start, a word, a spark. But you were sparking so much already... or was I sparking just by thinking of you?
Then the word came as sweet as your mouth as perfect as you. Incredible! And now here I am thinking about all the ways I can let you know how you are incredible without being cheesy or repeat myself... But when I think incredible I can't think about anything else or anyone else but you and how incredibly lucky I was to ever come across you, how my life became even more MY LIFE when part of it means you... Incredible afternoons waiting for the sunset, sitting in the sand, sipping some "see-cold" white wine... Incredible places we've been, holding hands, kissing, smiling and laughing... Incredible happiness we were gifted with...
You suggested superstition... But I don't believe in superstition. I do sleep only on the left side of the bed... and I never use the same cologne if I'm not with the same person... And I don't walk under stairs or plan something big for friday the 13th... I plan something amazing, enormous... But I'm not superstitious, I'm just crazy! And I agree with my friend that talks to the moon: I rather be crazy than stupid!

Never ending dream

One day you wake up and your life is upside down! The pillows are under your feet and the quilt is not covering you; you drink your toast and toast your coffee; you stick your arms in your trousers and your shirt around your waist; the moon shines all day long and the sun brights your nights; beer tastes like wine and wine tastes like water... Your friends are your lovers and your lovers are your friends, and that's when you start to doubt: because you always fucked your friends and kept your lovers as friends. So maybe this weird dream is no dream at all.

And you keep going!
Your clock counts down and time... You walk backwards...

Rain falls with the moon in the sky and it's day. And when the first drop falls in your face you doubt... but you keep walking (backwards) and you keep reaching nowhere. And then someone says hello and you're sure: everyone is where they should be - the nice guy still smiles like so many times before when you stop to buy smokes, the lady next to the traffic lights still sits on the floor begging, the bum still sleeps in the same public bench - but not you! This is not a dream and yes, your life is upside down! Why do you think everyone was looking at you? Don't you see you look weird when you wear your shirt around your waist like a skirt?

The Mirror

Hi!
Noticed you there before but you always seemed so... full of yourself that I never dared to tell you anything. But today you seem... almost human and something inside of me was telling me that it's really not so hard to talk to you, that you probably are a great person and you would understand everything I feel and everything I say.
I've seen you crying before, but you are so stubborn that everyone thinks that you have something in your eyes, or some kind of allergy.
I know you noticed me before too because I've seen you looking at me before, almost staring as if there was something wrong with me or you knew me from somewhere. And I think that's what always kept me away from talking to you. It's almost as if you can see straight through me, you can read my thoughts, anticipate my words. But now I'm no longer afraid because I don't know where my thoughts wonder, I don't know what's the next word coming out of my head, I feel as opaque as the curtains that guard my room from the evil morning sun. So if you can still see straight through me, if you can tell me what to say, this is the moment to do so and guide through my own life, at least for a day or two, a week or three? After all you're just me on that side of the mirror.

Adrenaline spike

The morning was dark but not as cold as before. The clouds take charge of the sky, but here and there I can see sunbeams ripping the monotonous grayish-white.
The morning was pretty normal - normal coffee intake, normal thoughts (of you), normal blood pressure, normal heart rate, normal nicotine intake... And then came lunch and I believe it was the energetic intake that boosted my hyper state. Now the blood pressure surely went up, the heart rate? Lets not even talk about that; try to refrain the nicotine intake and the caffeine addiction. Now my body has a will of its own, no longer answering to what my brain tries to rationalize! My legs move as if I needed to run away from here, away from some imminent danger (I do want to get out of here and run into your arms), my thoughts anticipate your return, our gathering... my ands shake nervously...
Only ours away, and these ours will feel like days, months, years, a whole eternity gone by. I already feel my few hair turning gray, then white, as the sky full of clouds, as waiting for the sun to shine, waiting for you, sunshine...

Waiting but not waiting

I'm waiting but I'm not waiting for you! Do I make any sense? Of course not, but I'll try to explain it to you, as you try to explain little kids why the sun goes away and the moon takes its place in the sky. And although everyone knows they're lovers, they're united but one of those never ending, life lasting loves, they never seem to be in the same place at the same time.
I'm waiting for you in the way that my life gains so much more meaning when I'm with you, when my feelings cheer my life and bright my days. I'm waiting, I'll always be waiting for you. But then again I'm not waiting for you. Things come and go, people come and go, just like the waves in the sea. But every time a new wave comes to the shore, new water kisses the sand...
So you come and go, I come and go and every time we meet again it's a new start, a new adventure, almost a new feeling.
So I do wait for you, but I know I'll see a new you, because tomorrow is always a new day!

Of course not!

Of course you won't mind if I'm here or there, if I cry or if I'm pissed because I'm expecting something as simple as respect, understanding and consideration. But I guess I should be used to that by now, used to be a shadow in a sunny day and absolutely nothing when there's no light for me to cover.
I wake up in rage but then the sun outside smooths my andger, my rage and I can't help but think all the times we were holding hands, walking in the snow with the sun burning in our eyes... And your smile... Your smile shining even more than normally, almost daring to shut down the sun light. And as the song states: "You'll always find a way to keep me right here waiting, always find the words to say to keep me right here waiting"
So here I am, right here, waiting...

In the end

Times have come when you rethink every single detail of your life, from the decision you do not know when it happened of stopping to have breakfast, to the heavy weight step you don't know how it happened of falling in love.
You realize how some things are meaningless and pointless in pursuing while other are so important and you never ever gave it decent thinking.
When such times come it is inevitable to think in the most rational way and ask yourself: In the end what's really going to matter?
The answer to this question changes form time to time, from person to person. More hurt people dedicate their time to their careers, passionate people are always willing to leave all and every one for the love of their lives. Crazy people seem to be happy no matter what turns out in the end. You can call them crazy or maybe hedonists, because no matter what's next in line to happen they know they can always enjoy themselves and appreciate life as the greatest gift ever.
Even to me, the crazy passionate hedonist, a broken heart with a smile seems unlikely or even impossible, but if you know that life's pleasures are a never ending list of orgasmic sensations and unique tastes... then no pain can drag you to the last station, no pain is able to move you away from your destiny - happiness!
A broken heart never seems to be vaccinated against another challenge, a career is never the last upgrade in your life, the final destination of eternal knowledge.
It doesn't matter if you know all the answers. What is important is what will you do when new questions cross your way!

the day your heart exploded

The sun shines now after the snow fall. Can you imagine a better scenario for your heart to explode?
It's not a pretty sigh. There's blood all over, rage and passion laying on the same wall, side by side...
So many times she made you feel like shit, lost and alone, always wrong... so many times that happens that one day your heart reaches the limit and explodes!
You keep that dark rock covered with ice that will keep your blood flow, that will make you smile once in a while, that will remind you of your friends... But you don't forget that easily that someone fucked up your heart and you have to build it from scratch once again.
But it's not the first time, but you hope this will be the last... But that's life! And either you accept it and live it, or you're as good as dead!